Bunk, Desk & Toliet - Empathy

Many men feel misunderstood.

As I lay on my bunk, a thought occurred to me. Many men feel misunderstood. But with the proper guidance, support, and understanding, we can help them overcome this feeling and achieve their full potential.

Empathy

“Empathy is not enablement. Empathy is not accepting excuses. Empathy is not an accessory tone crime of self-sabotaging behavior.”

Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and many people are thinking about how to express their love to their significant other. Some may choose to express their love through a romantic dinner, while others may decide to give a gift of physical affection. Whatever the gesture of love may be, offering the gift of Empathy is essential. It is crucial to understand and acknowledge your partner's feelings and needs and show that you care about their emotional well-being. Adding Empathy to your gift can make it even more meaningful and unique.

Empathy is not enablement. Empathy is not accepting excuses. Empathy is not an accessory tone crime of self-sabotaging behavior. Empathy is imaginatively stepping into another person's shoes, understanding their feelings and perspectives, and using that understanding to guide your actions.

A man's masculinity doesn't erase his need for Empathy. There have been seasons in my life where people were not expressing the kind of Empathy that I needed because they didn't understand the burden I was carrying. I've been in prison for thirty years, and it's by God's grace that I made it. Grace makes a hard thing look easy. If people only knew that just because I'm not stressed out doesn't mean I'm not stressed. Just because I'm not cracking under pressure doesn't mean I'm not feeling pressured.

“Empathy is absent because there is an unawareness of the battles in these men's lives.”

I'm not asking for an applause. I'm not asking for a trophy. I'm not asking for a cookie. I'm not asking for a party. What I and other men need is understanding. Because if you don't understand a person, you will abuse them.

I want to offer you some insight that will increase your understanding of the lives of the men in your life: your husband, son, brother, nephew, and uncle. I have learned that sometimes Empathy is absent because there is an unawareness of the battles in these men's lives. Some people are not expressing Empathy because they are not aware.

Men are fighting...

Men are fighting rejection they don't understand. There are assumptions in our culture that only women deal with rejection. A man's response to rejection may differ, but the wounds causing it are the same. Rejection is a refusal to accept someone for who they are. It's not a coddling dysfunction. It's not embracing self-destructed or unhealthy behavior. Rejection leads to suppression. It's unfortunate that so many guys out there feel like they have to suppress their needs and desires. As a result, many turn to unhealthy sources to fulfill those needs. It's important to find positive and healthy ways to meet our needs to lead fulfilling and happy lives.

Men are fighting weakness; they did not pick

• YES, men are responsible for their actions!

• YES, men are responsible for the responses to their impulses

• YES, men are responsible for the decisions they make when tempted.

HE PICKS THAT! But He doesn't pick his weaknesses!

So when you give a GIFT to a man in your life to express your love, add to that gift the gift of Empathy.

~Dr.Korey D Henderson

P.S. Please like this page and share your comments in the comments section. I am preparing a series on why men struggle with communicating their emotions. If you have any questions about why men struggle with their emotions, please write your questions or concerns and anything else you would like to learn and know to help a friend or loved one healthily communicate their feelings.