A Bunk, A Desk, and A Toilet Series

University of Stinking Thinking

I had a celly (cellmate) named George, a huge guy. He was a good guy in his own way. We shared a cell together for about two years. George was one of those guys who loved to debate. I say that he loves to argue. George thought he was smarter than everyone in the room. Do you know someone at work or in your family that thinks they know everything and is right about everything? This was George.

It's funny because George would always want to debate/argue when he was on the toilet taking a number 2. George was new in prison, so he was new to prison etiquette. Yes, even in prison, there is an etiquette for the toilet. It is called "the curtsey flush." Better known as down one drown one. No one wants to smell another person's crap while using the toilet. George disagreed with this.

The problem is that George would eat anything he wanted. Because he is a huge guy, it is like a biohazard smoke bomb that affects my thinking during our debates when he takes a dump. Plain and simple, George's crap smelled like open sewage at the water recycling plant. When he would rant and rave during our conversation, I would jokingly comment that he must have gotten his degree at the "University of Stinky Thinking."

Regardless of where you live, everyone has a toilet in their home where they sit to get the crap out of them. Some of us are so full of crap that we have more crap to get out than others.

I have learned many valuable lessons while sitting on the toilet, getting my crap out of me. I am not one of those who think my crap doesn't stink who the etiquette of a courtesy flush is. I have cell manners. I know the etiquette of a courtesy flush.

One important lesson I learned that keeps me motivated. I remember one day when I had the meatloaf at lunch in the chow hall (prison eating area). The meatloaf was the usual "surprise meat." The "surprise meat" is never meat; it is a mixture of this and that. You eat it real fast and try not to think of where it came from. My Aunt Maggie, who I affectionately called my "Big Sis," was a horrible cook. According to her husband, Thomas, she is now a good cook. OMG, this was a surprise to me. Maggie and I are more like brother and sister, instead of not aunt and nephew. She was the one who looked after me while my mother was at work. Back to the "surprise meat," I don't care how long a person is in prison; your stomach never becomes accustomed to "surprise meat." That's why in prison, we say commissary is necessary." The food in prison is horrible.

My stomach was bubbling this day. As I sat on my "steel throne" (toilets in prison are made out of stainless steel), I learned a valuable lesson at the "University of Stinking Thinking."

Sitting on the toilet, I learned that "someday" and "one day" are never on the calendar. Regardless of our ethnicity, we all have the same 24 hours daily. Time is a precious resource. You can not get back today when it is gone. I remembered something I read in "Make TodayCount by Maxwell." John Maxwell said, "You will never change your life until you change something you do daily." Success does not just occur suddenly one day in someone's life. For that matter, neither does failure. Each is a process. Every day of your life is merely preparation for the next. What you become is the result of what you do today. You are preparing for something. The way you live life today is preparing you for your tomorrow. The question is, what are you preparing for?

Are you grooming yourself for success or failure? I gave a courtesy flush as I sat on the toilet and thought about the words I read. The idea was appealing to me. I could really make a difference; I can make count today. Blaming others and/or making excuses will never get anything worthwhile done. People often speak of if this happens or when that happens. I will do this, they say. It is if they are waiting on the conditions to be right before they take a step towards their goals. We make the conditions suitable when we take a step towards our goals. Studies show that the biggest regret isn't a person's action that failed but the regret of inaction. The things we wish we had done. Procrastination is the opposite of decision-making and a common enemy we all must conquer.

I gave another courtesy flush while on the toilet; I realized that nothing will changes until I change. Now is the right time I needed to get up off the toilet. I needed to change my s"stinking thinking." I needed to make every day count. Life is a precious gift. What I do with that fit shows my appreciation for life's gift giver?

Are you willing to listen to your inner wisdom and go where the messages, lessons, and guidance take you? What circumstances in your life have you used as an opportunity for growth?

"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and you do are in harmony"

--Mahatma Gandhi

Dr. Korey D. Henderson

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